The responsibility of happiness

Happiness is my motivation… and it is yours too.

I do what I do because I want to share happiness. I do so because I have true happiness in every moment. And I know that this happiness is within us all and at the heart of every person’s quest. The desire for happiness makes us all the same. And if you are to consider your motivations in every moment, if you look a little deeper than the surface, you will see that everything you are doing, everything you reach for, is driven by the hope that it will bring you a little more happiness.

Interestingly though, most people’s quest for happiness is dependent on external circumstances. We so often place the source of happiness on outer conditions – thinking that if everything around us can meet our needs it will make us happy. We even blame life and others for our unhappiness. However the truth is, if you want to be happy in life, you have to take responsibility for yourself. Letting your self be defined by others or by life’s external circumstances will keep you feeling as if true (and lasting) happiness is out of your reach. In doing so you become a victim of circumstance. Letting your self be a victim is a sure path to unhappiness.

Victims believe things just happen to them, that nothing is their fault and that other people make them feel or do things. This only generates blame, resentment and envy.

Ultimately our life… and our happiness within life… is up to each one of us ‘personally’.

Even Aristotle said

“happiness depends on our selves”.


At the surface level happiness is a choice. It requires us to approach life consciously, to choose our responses and actions with self-responsibility. At the deepest level it is our true nature.

In the first instance, we must recognise that happiness – and the energy of happiness – comes from deep within our own being. It’s what gives us the energy and motivation to be kind, loving, gentle and giving.

You will notice that these energies all express a movement from our inner being to the outer world.

Happiness energy doesn’t come from the outside world. It’s not something we can take. It’s something we feel most deeply when we are inwardly connected, open and extending ourselves to life and to others.

In order to be able to feel this inner energy we must cultivate certain attitudes and actions.

Here are 7 happiness connections.

  • Be connected – at your centre – and with life. Without this you drain meaning and energy from your life. Let yourself be touched by others and life. Engage with each moment – give your connection to others deeply and authentically.


  • Take responsibility for your self. Live from your own centre. Be true to our self. And take responsibility for all your thoughts, feelings and actions. Be self-empowered.


  • Choose the tone of your life carefully. It is better to have a heart full of gratitude than a head full of attitude. Be accepting and understanding rather than judging and criticising. Be light and laugh rather than take everything seriously. Appreciate each day and each moment – counting the small things as great blessings. Notice the goodness that surrounds you.


  • Cultivate love – without it your life will be empty and meaningless. Reach for a deeper love than personal passion or sentiment. Discover self-care and a respect for the equality of all.


  • Find a way to contribute to others and the world. Choose to work for the good of all, not for the indulgence of just your self or your own family, nor to the detriment of any other.


  • Show up and be present for each moment. To enjoy your life you have to be there for it! When you are distracted or dis-engaged happiness energy drains from your life. Presence creates moment to moment enjoyment and is the abode of true lasting happiness.


  • Remember that circumstantial happiness is not a wise thing to strive for. It is fleeting and conditionally dependent on external circumstances. Cultivate joy from within by learning to master your mind and emotions.


Most importantly, remember that happiness is simple. It is not complicated, nor is it discovered through the complicated measures of our life.

Live simply, be present and give wholly and happiness will be your constant companion.


In Loving Oneness,

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